Tag: distractions

Sagittarius

Posted on by Ashlee Scheuerman in Thoughts

Whether or not you believe in the traits of the Zodiac, sometimes the descriptions are far too apt and entertaining. I’ve been a big fan of the Zodiac for as long as I’ve known about it. Be it the Western Zodiac, Chinese Zodiac, Native American Zodiac, or any other cultural Astrology belief, I think there’s some wisdom to be taken from all of them.

From a Zodiac page on Avia Venefica’s awesome symbology website, What’s Your Sign, we have this little description of the Sagittarius:

Sagittarius – The Centaur
November 22 – December 21
Here we have the philosopher among the zodiac signs and meanings. Like the Scorpio, they have great ability for focus, and can be very intense. However, they must channel their energy or they will waste time and wear themselves out going in too many directions at once. They are not very patient and expect quick results. However, when encountered with failure they make extreme comebacks often against incredible odds. They make loyal friends and lovers, but they do not handle commitment well as they refuse to be tied down while chasing philosophical pursuits.

Yeah. See the third and fourth sentences? I’ve been having a very Sagittarius week, doing everything at once, being impatient at the lack of results, and generally wasting a lot of time.

Now, that’s not too much of a bad thing. I’m also optimistic to a fault, and yes, I will bounce back from this week with more coffee-fuelled enthusiasm! I’m tempted to say, “I haven’t gotten anything done!”, but the reality is, I’ve gotten a lot of pieces of things done. Extra jewellery was produced for The Dragon’s Hoard, as well as writing out all the price tags I just received in the mail. I’ve been asked to participate as a sponsor for charity, and have to organise even more jewellery-related work for that. About four blog posts are half-written and saved for later.

I wrote, definitely, but I also edited as I went (bad mistake), and ended up cutting about 50% of the work, hence my progress bar hasn’t been touched for several days.

I’ve taken care of the cats, and the fish, and a whole lot of housework. I’ve done gardening, and grocery shopping, and maintained contact with my social groups. I cooked many delicious things, most of which I promptly ate. I’ve currently got two major crocheting projects half-finished that I can barely bring myself to look at, because I know how much longer it will take me to finish them, and don’t you know, I have other things to do!

Yeah… It’s about time to rein in the wild, galloping centaur at the core of my multi-project enthusiasm so I can just get things done. It’s hard coming to terms with priorities. Sometimes, for me, it seems like an insurmountable task.

~A

Just half of a fully forgotten memory

Posted on by Ashlee Scheuerman in Other Writers, Thoughts

I collect things. Anyone who knows me in person can probably tell you something I collect. Ask ten different people, and they probably tell you I collect ten different things. The truth is, I just keep stuff, not in a deadly-hoarder kind of fashion, but in the “this is useful or interesting or taught me something valuable and I must retain it until it no longer serves that purpose to me” kind of way.

Books, and video games (spanning well over two decades of production), DVDs and CDs flow out of a dozen shelves in my house. I have small wooden boxes and large vintage suitcases, collections of wool, yarn, thread, and scraps of fabric for sewing and creating. Tumbled gemstones, Tarot decks, notebooks and little paper and fabric gift baggies that I usually find another great purpose for.

I also collect quotes and inspiring stories. My favourite is collecting writing advice that doesn’t tell you any of the specific things, but rings that clear, pealing bell inside me, the one that says, “TRUTH!”.

Now, I don’t have the best functioning memory in the world. I usually attribute that to replacing memories too frequently with new information, new ideas. I don’t recall specifics of things I’ve read very well, and that is a kind of blessing. Some days when I’m feeling really lost or uninspired, I might decide to browse through my interesting writing file. Just see if I’ve got anything in there that will remind me why I should do any of it.

I’ll usually find something. Rather, I usually find this blog post by Merlin Mann: Making the Clackity Noise. I can’t remember where I first found this article, or why I read it. It came from somewhere.

It rang true to me in all the right ways. And even if I don’t always end up writing something significant afterwards, I’m happy, because just a little bit of a story fell out of me. I think we get way too caught up trying to do it “right”. There isn’t a right. There is, however, a write. That’s what I’m going to briefly remember to do.

~A

And now, a return to your regular viewing

Posted on by Ashlee Scheuerman in Blogging, Thoughts, Writing

I can safely say from August 9th through until today (September 5th, I note), I have done next to nothing productive. I actually went away during that time, and should have had normal internet to retain contact and updates, but just a fluke of location made the connection non-viable. Aside from that, with my cat dying, and being hit by the most god-awful case of influenza, I just lost a lot of time in the past month.

I have glimmers of awareness that I am, in fact, rejoining the land of the living. I can stay awake for most of the day! For a while there, I was actually sleeping some obscene amount, over 20 hours a day. That is unheard of in my life, so there’s some gauge for the severity of my illness and despair. I’m also hungry. You can always tell that I’m on my way back to good health when eating becomes a priority again.

With my experiences to reflect upon, I have come to terms with the fact that I have absolutely no way to focus on my writing whenever I go away. I take my equipment, I intend on using spare time to keep working, and it NEVER happens. Ever. So I accept that I am not an out-of-house writer.

It was a surreal feeling to truly quantify how long it had been since I was even mentally in my story world. I considered this while I was still pretty ill and prone to sleeping all day, so the thoughts were kind of hazy. I was actually wondering what I used to do, before all this, before the month. Who was I? What was important? It was like my characters were under an invisibility cloak, and I had suddenly realised the room was very empty. So I searched, and I came across an anomaly in all that blankness, something from a half-remembered dream. I used to write. I have people waiting for me, stories not fully told.

It didn’t all come rushing back in some blaze of creative glory. I was probably in the middle of drifting back to sleep, but the knowledge had been released, freed from the cone of silence. I thought of names and faces I hadn’t considered for almost an entire month, of their plans and conflicts, and it was weird. Weird that I hadn’t thought of them, when they had consumed so much of my mind previously. Weird to think about them again, and not have the clarity of the constant, immediate work on their story, but also weird because there was that secret little passion tucked away with them. The one that makes me a writer. I remembered their story, and it began niggling in the back of my head. I want to read what I’ve already written, and throw myself back in. I need to.

So maybe to say I’ve rejoined the land of the living isn’t entirely honest. I’ve woken up, though. I’m here. The part of me that doesn’t just lay around and feel sad and lost is gaining ground, gently soothing back the parts which are still tired and raw. And I missed you guys. I like my collection of internet peoples, you’re all so bright and interesting! It’s nice to be aware again. I hope your month hasn’t been anything like mine.

~A

Of all the best intentions

Posted on by Ashlee Scheuerman in Blogging, Thoughts

I make plans to blog on Sunday, and that’s fine. I forget it’s Sunday when it is. I remember, and half-write a post. I get distracted and irritable, then watch anime for four hours (finally got around to watching Darker Than Black, and it’s all kinds of awesome). I forget it’s Sunday again, or forget I meant to blog, I’m not sure which happened anymore.

Monday morning, and I look back over the past week of taking a break from most major writing. I’m feeling the urge coming back, but I still have a handful of other responsibilities. I ignore half of them, and read the internet to see what other people were doing while I was asleep. Then I remember to blog, and come to write this post.

After walking beside the beach yesterday, I want to take a little more time. Relax, hang out. We’ve got something vacation-like booked in a week or thereabouts, but as with all organised holidays, it’s never really that chill for me. There are Things that we Will Be Doing. It’s planned. I enjoy going to new places, and it’s awesome that my husband gets so excited to be doing something different, but it won’t be the same as just sitting around outside.

Some people write long blogs, and I could do that. Keep going, talk more in-depth about my thoughts, my work, whatever comes to mind. But I write short, as just a window into my daydreams. As with all the best intentions, I’d like to go laze about under the rain, but I’ll probably get back to writing a story soon. I can feel it building.

~A

Surprise, this is what you’re writing now

Posted on by Ashlee Scheuerman in Writing

I have been absolutely consumed by a new story.

I was doing so well! A strong start on book two of the novella series, getting through a quick edit on book one, then all of a sudden I’m just hit with this idea. It came to me almost fully-formed, ready to go. Characters popped out of nowhere, with flawless interaction, solid personalities and reason for being. I kept interrupting work to write parts of it, and as soon as I arrived home, I got right back into it.

At this stage, from what I can tell, it’s probably another short story. Horror, maybe a little more “typical” than my other horror works, which tend to be very psychological with minimal blood and gore. I don’t know an approximate word count yet, but I’m hoping it won’t take too long to write. I was genuinely enjoying the novellas. The characters in that series are really exciting to write about, and there is so much potential. This, though… this is just stuck in my head, and I’m certainly not going to let it go to waste by working around it, even if I am somewhat torn between my stories.

There’s a good chance that I’ll write part of the story and come to a point where I don’t need to continue right away; there are plenty of others in my project list that have taken that route. Of course, with it already started, I shouldn’t have any trouble coming back to it at a later date to finish it off. On the other hand, I might just be stuck with the idea until I’ve written it all out.

One of the funniest things about this story? The characters came to me with names already, all except the main character. I have no idea what his name is. Maybe it will never be revealed. Maybe he is to remain nameless. We will have to see as it all pans out.

~A

Never write on an empty stomach

Posted on by Ashlee Scheuerman in Thoughts, Writing

Okay, I don’t know about everyone else, but I get seriously cranky if I haven’t eaten in a while. My mood takes a really sharp decline when my stomach is empty, and considering how much I love food, it’s not surprising that eating has a way of improving my outlook immediately.

Being hungry is super distracting. Not just because I’m thinking about how much I’d like to chow down, but I get vague and even more forgetful than usual (which is a very bad thing). Then there’s the criticism. I get horrendously irritable and critical of everything when I’m hungry. I might not show it outwardly, but I end up kind of resenting things until I’ve had my next meal.

Trying to write when I’m that grumpy is a seriously awful idea. It’s better to just grab a snack and get back to the work later, when I’m riding the food-high.

I won’t turn this into a massive spiel, but I do stop to think about how my situation is so blessed: my food is easy to come by. There are people out there who never know when they will eat next. I like giving to charities, so let me just say, if you can afford to give a dollar, or drop a can of soup into an organisation’s donation box, know that you did make a difference to someone. If everyone who has “enough” can donate just a little, we’ll change the world for the better.

Anyway, I’m heading back to my story now. Here’s to hoping for another 800+ word flash of writing.

~A